Understanding Computer Jargon
*(The Definitive Definition's)*

Are you terrified of your computer? Do you feel lost and out of place when your friends or co-workers start spouting reams of technical jargon that you never understand? Then this article will help you to get over your fear of technical terminology.

486: - The average IQ needed to understand a basic PC.

State-Of-The-Art: - Any computer you can't possibly afford.

Obsolete: - Any computer you already own.

Microsecond: - The time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete.

Syntax Error: - Hi, I want to buy a computer and money is no object.

GUI: - What your computer becomes after spilling your coffee on it.

Keyboard: - The standard way to generate computer errors.

Mouse: - An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate.

Floppy: - The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer.

Hard Drive: - The sales technique employed by computer salesmen.

Portable Computer: - A device invented to force businessmen to work at home, on holiday, and on business trips.

Disk Crash: - A typical computer response to any critical deadline.

Power User: - Anyone who can format a disk from DOS.

System Update: - A quick method of trashing ALL of your software.

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